A Tribute To My Beautiful One – Six Months On

Today marks six months since my wife Mara passed away from cancer on November 22nd, 2020 and not a day goes by that I don’t think of her and how much joy she has brought to my life.

Lately I’ve been asking myself the question “what have I learned from the last six months?” Of course I’m still processing all of this and will continue to do so for a long time. I mean that’s what grief is I suppose, but what I have noticed lately is that…

  • Life is far too short for me to be waiting for permission to do something with it
  • Fear is all in my head
  • I suffer fools even less gladly than I normally would
  • People spend too much time complaining about first world problems

Now, I haven’t written any songs since completing the FAWM 14 Songs In 28 Days Songwriting Challenge (which was a wonderfully cathartic experience), but I wanted to show you this, the most recent song I’ve written. 

It’s called My Last Goodbye

This is a song I’m pretty proud of and it really encapsulates my feelings for our relationship and how I’m feeling about everything now plus, the bassline is pretty cool too.

Seriously though, this is what songwriting is about for me, putting into a song what I would normally find difficult to put into words and My Last Goodbye is a great example of this. 

Enjoy.


My Last Goodbye
© 28/2/2021 C. Stewart

Verse 1
If I looked up to the nights sky
And counted all of the stars
It would never get me closer
Closer to where you are
If I stood beside the ocean
And stared at the horizon
The expanse of what’s before me
Is so small compared to my love

Chorus
There is nothing I can take
For this loneliness inside
There is nowhere I can run to
And nowhere I can hide
Everywhere I look I’m finding
Reminders of your life
I guess it’s time for me now
To say my last goodbye

Verse 2
If I had a go reciting
All the digits that made up Pi
There’d be not enough numbers
To describe the love of you and I
If I could travel through time
I’d go back to where we started
Just reliving every moment
As if we never parted

Chorus

Solo

Chorus


I can now feel myself just lifting my eyes up from the fog a bit and take my first steps back out into the real world. And what have I noticed? Well, nothing much has changed, the sun still rises in the morning and the world is still going about its daily business.

This has shown me that regardless of what is going on for me, life continues to go on. So I will continue my life’s journey, one day at a time and with one foot in front of the other as this is what Mara would’ve wanted me to do.

But I still miss her… Always.

Peace,

Corey 🙂

12 Comments

  1. Stunning lyrics – again really sorry to hear this news.

    I understand what you mean about the fog lifting and then realising that the world is still ticking and moving along. That’s what it was like for me when my sister passed away from BC when she was 34.

    It felt cruel. My world had stopped, but the rest of the world hadn’t. All you can do is take things one hour or one day at a time and adjust to a new normal that is going to suck for a long while.

    1. Thank you for taking time out to comment Christine and YES you’re absolutely right about the new normal I find myself in… It totally sucks.

      But I also realise though, that it is what it is, and all I can do is acknowledge it, embrace it and slowly but surely move forward.

      Lovely to hear from you BTW, I hope all is well with you and yours 🙂

  2. A Beautiful song filled with love and courage.
    A Beautiful melody as well.
    I remember a sunny afternoon at our place when Mara and you, the band and a few friends got together and made some sweet music. It was a very happy day!
    You always have friends down this way mate!
    Anna and David
    xx

    1. Thank you Anna and David. I’m glad you enjoyed the songs and YES, I do remember that day well and YES, it was a fantastic day getting down to your neck of the woods. I must get myself down your way again soon.
      Corey 🙂 x

  3. Mate, what a journey. Was shocked to hear about your loss and so sorry… big thanks for sharing part of your story through this song. We love it.. be great to catch up for a play sometime too if you feel like it. You’re always welcome down this way..

  4. Hey Cory. Just came across this blog and song, My Last Goodbye. So sorry to hear and hope the healing hands of time are holding you up well. So good to hear play on this song and yes that bass line is cool, loud and proud! Well done mate stay safe and well.

    1. Hey Jaia, how are you mate? Great to hear from you.
      Thank you for your kind words and yes, the healing hands of time have been kind to me.
      I hope all is well with you and yours and that you’re still playing the guitar like a badass 🙂

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